Friday, January 8, 2010
♥ :(
im totally tired.i need to understand you. you need to start speaking up. if you dont i'll nvr understand and i'll nvr be able to figure out things. i dont want u to live in regrets, i really hope i know what THOUGHTS IS GOING THRU YOU. I DONT CARE IF IT'S SELFISH OR NOT. YOU OUGHT TO BE SELFISH IF U REALLY WANT ME. I DONT LIKE WHEN U SAY U DONT CARE BUT I KNOW DEEP DOWN YOU DO. I KNOW YOU'RE TIRED. YOU CANT BE BOTHERED TO SWEET TALK ME AT LEAST TELL ME SOMETHING FOR 1 MIN THAT YOU ACTUALLY CARED FOR ME. i know whatever tonight is a mess and it hurted u. i didnt mean it. im someone that emotions get way too difficult for me to control. im more like a girl to anybody. emotions taking control... loser is me... what i meant is that. all this mess i got into wasnt on purpose, i will pull out of this i know im not into deep shit yet. but i really need you to help me out. you get your night talks with her but im all alone. you prolly nvr thought of how i pass my every night. well at least for tonight you'll know that i actually cried a lot while kissing u in my handphone. i really need u to tell me what i should do and what u really want and what u dislike. i want u to be selfish and control me even we're still not together. this is prolly how much i really love u. i cant express my love for u anymore. im really now a total emotional freak that i cannot balance up in my life alr. 3 weeks of holiday was nvr enough. i love you i really do but my equation is not linking and i cant sleep tonight! so screwed..... i really dont want to talk to others, sometimes im really forced with no choice because nobody is there for me... i hope you can understand me. all this thoughts are real. i list them down hoping one day it will enlighten u to come back to me. i prayed to whoever is up there that you will stay happy. i want u to have ur best. "WHAT IS LOVE?" has been inside me. maybe the right answer is just watching your love one being the happiest ever.. maybe you dont need to get them to be happy but wish that they are happy. am i right am i wrong? am i suppose to leave you? or stay by you? you see so many nonsense. please when u read this. tell me more about you. stop hiding from me and telling me you;'re busy or feeling super stress out. you dont have to stress over unnecessary stuffs. you say that she makes u feel better. but u had to control and make sure she's not affected. isnt it like me. trying to make sure things dont get out of hands. im really puzzled. are u really happy? can i help u to make u happier? by all means tell me ! im just your good friend now.. although deep down we're huge lovers. put the love away and treat me as ur besties. i really want to know more of u. u said nobody can understand you. make me the first. let me be inside you. let me feel you of everything. believe in me, if i can i want to make u fly. but if u dont pass me your hands, we can nvr fly together. u had many failed boys r/s. im not them. have faith this time round and trust me. i wont break your heart. i dont ask u to get back to me now. all i want is to understand u more so that i can give u my best if we can be back.. no point typing so much. this post just relates back to the older ones. can u wake up from ur dream? this is reality. you really dont care if u lose me? i gave up my pride for u. just for me. forget every other factor. nothing is really important if u really want me and cherish me. :(
♥ And did I tell you that I love you tonight
12:25 AM
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12:25 AM
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